Even though everyone had told me that I wasn't the running type, I have to tell you I am really enjoying myself. I jogged another 1.3 miles today, sprinting at the end, and while my face turned a horrible color, it was really good to pound out my moodiness first thing in the morning. My life is in such a crazy place -- with my husband 70 miles away, my churchwork slowing down WAY too much during the summer since everyone heads north, and my kids buzzing from camp to camp -- I don't know who's coming or when I'm going. But pushing my own body is something I have a bit of control over, and the rhythmic pounding of my heart rhyming with my breath is helping me find peace in the chaos.
In the meantime, I wish I knew how to make my life less crazy. I wish I knew a way I could live with my husband AND pay the bills right now. I wish I knew what God was calling me to do and how to watch that happen. But right now I don't. So I'll keep pounding the pavement. I do enjoy it. But don't tell anybody.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
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